Smashing In, Clocking Out
by Ohyouknowtheone
Summary: Held captive against their will, the Smash Brothers face an eternity of abuse and oppression from forces they can't fully comprehend. While some have resigned to their fate, others dare to bite back at the "Hand" that feeds them, so to speak. Join Captain Olimar and Samus Aran as they discover a plot to overthrown their disfigured overlords and fight to return home.


Those eyes don't say a damn word. From the moment I stepped off the platform taking me to my Final Destination, he hasn't expressed any emotion. Nothing more than a glare since he was caught after I launched him into the nothingness like I launch my rocket from my home planet Hocotate - with a chance of crash landing. And yet he yields no response. I'm not surprised, it's a part of the old reptilian shit's personality, but I was hoping he'd at least clap like my usual victim would.

After the camera stops rolling and the lights dim, I turn to my opponent. "Hey, good fight back there, you almost had me a couple of times." My opponent doesn't speak, but his glare intensifies, and I feel that if combat weren't forbidden outside of matches he would be attempting to roast me with his flame breath. My smile drops. "You know I don't have any more of a choice in this than you do. We're both trying to earn our freedom." Bowser snarls, insulted that I would imply that I might be anything except for a bloodthirsty fighter that wanted to keep him from escaping this endless torment.

I stare at my former opponent, thinking about the pivotal moments of our battle. He only stared back looking angrier than the last time I looked. We separated into the main hall where we wait for our next challenger. I see a few familiar faces, faces of those I've battled. Then I think, this whole thing is rigged, I find a water fountain and take a small drink of water to prepare myself for the next fight. Then the announcer comes over on the P.A "Get ready for the next fight."

I felt a pang of perhaps dread well up deep down somewhere, but it was dramatically overshadowed by something else that I was now uncomfortably familiar with. The will to survive, the thrill of the fight, perhaps the best description for it would be grim excitement, for else could it be? I fight, I survive, I earn my freedom, the more I win, the closer I will come to my goal. Long ago, longer back than I care to admit, I recall having hope that more of us could survive this, that all of us could earn our freedom. I was naive then. That is nothing but a dead dream now, slaughtered in the constant conflict of this world.

We are but toys to them, forced to abide to the commands they impose. When they command walk, we walk. When told to run, we run. When told to jump off into the void, we must in this endless combat. I wish I was one of those who managed to escape from the hands controlling us, like Snake so long ago. I sigh to myself- the only reason he escaped was because he studied the arena, finding the tiniest flaw and slipping through the black hole. Others like Mewtwo and Roy escaped too, but the creators were furious. They searched the realm they slipped away to, snatching them back and wiping any will to fight they formerly had.

Lights begin to blare, scattering my thoughts as the rest of my form is scattered across time and space. The pounding in my ears is so vicious I could swear they were bleeding. My limbs shake and my fingers tremble, grasping for stability that had long since ceased to exist. The only comfort I have is the inevitability of the sensations fading, as they had countless times before. Eventually, I feel the vague sense of control I still possess returning to me. The sounds relax, light clears, and my eyes slowly adjusting to my new surroundings…

...Some asshole picked poke-floats.

I take in my surroundings, The sky is a light purple, with the sun rising over the horizon above the skyline. I seem to be standing on a giant floating Electrode, with countless other inflatable pocket monsters floating around me, acting as platforms. I recognize a small pink orb standing on a float near me, and she turns to look at me, her eyes taking up most of her face. "Hey sugar, looks like it's you and me." She grimaces as she says this, lowering into what I think is a fighting stance, I can't really tell with her nubby limbs. I call a few pikmin to me, and ball up my fists, preparing for whatever she does next.

But why? Why do I continue to follow their plan? This endless cycle of bullshit might have an exit, but it certainly won't be doing what I've been doing for the past… well, ever I guess. So I decide to do what nobody has ever done before. I step to the side, and into the unknown. Lights flash before my eyes, as I tumble onto the ground, unmoving yet somehow aware. A gloved hand enters my vision. " You are far from where you should be, little one. Return to your place." And I faded, only to find myself back where I started. "Hey sugar, looks like it's you and me." Fucking shit.

As the fight goes on, I'm continuously running away from this pink ass bitch like a little bitch. I grimace, wishing that this was 2008, but in the wild, you make do with what you have. Sometimes, the only way out is to run around being racist toward a floaty while being a little bitch. Still, she appears to be filling with determin… wait fuck, wrong game. But then, as I look up, I see why she is looking confident. It's so colorful, floating around in the sky innocently, and as it floats towards her, she taps it, and suddenly fills with color. And she begins to grow. And grow. And Grow. And grow. But then I realize, she's fucking garbage. This was all a part of my plan. Just make her seem strong to make idiots think she's good, only to see her get completely exposed. Is this the way? The way to finally find freedom? Get rid of the weak and the fake in order to achieve the true strength? As she deflates, completely exhausted from the final smash, I walk up to her, purple pikmin in hand, ready to deliver the final blow. Is this really what I must do? Is this really who I am? I pause…

I won't settle for mercy, I want to win. I want to escape. I don't want to fight my friends, no matter how little they might talk with me, but the only way to stop this madness is to settle this the only way I know how - I've got to break through the ceiling. And that means Jigglypuff gets beat down first. Reaching into the ground, I rip a subterranean little guy out of the superfluously painted float below me, a big purple pikmin of comparable size of my opponent. Tossing him upward into the stubby pink blob, they bounce off each other and ricochet into the stars. I take a moment to pray for whoever has to clean that up off the background. It's the end of day, and the pokémon takes a moment to congratulate me after the match. I'm not very proud of it, but I've got to move forward. My quest, my inevitable destiny, to beat sky in smash, begins here.

My breaths are shallow and pained, but they're the only thing I can cling onto, the only song in my head. Exhaustion creeps into my bones and my limbs feel heavy as death. My opponent, on the other hand, seems as spry and calm as when the match began. The ninja was silent, playing with the needles in her hand as though they were toys, as though our whole affair was nothing but a game to her. She eyed me with an equally playful expression, baiting me into my next move. Feeling anger cloud my judgement, I leapt at her from across the gap, flicking the cap back on my paralyzer and letting the white-hot energy within flare. The tendril of plasma energy shot towards her at blinding speeds, but not fast enough. It singed the air where her slim form had been milliseconds before, replaced with a thick mass of dark gray smoke. Choking on the fumes, I nearly tripped as my feet hit the ground. The next thing I knew, a leg shot from the smoke and slammed into my side, making me cry out in pain and lose what little balance I had retained.

Toppling over, I barely had the sense of mind to dig my heels in before I went over the edge, going over meant death or worse, revival. Neither option was particularly appealing at this point. Death would be the end, I had never particularly given any credit to the idea of an afterlife, but surely even an ending would be better than returning to this hell? Yet no matter how many times someone went over they always came back to fight again. Why should I bother to waste my time going through that unpleasant process, when I could be continuing the fight, here and now. I forced myself forward and charged that damned ninja again, intent on bringing her down a few pegs, if for no other purpose than my own long bruised pride.

Breathless and beaten, I reeled back in hopes of landing an impossible last shot, yet I knew it was pointless. Before I could force myself forward she had knocked me to the ground, leaving me bruised and winded.

"It's over."

She said, raising her arm to the sky and bending it towards me. I closed my eyes, accepting my defeat.

One moment, two moments…

I opened my eyes to see a fist stopped mere inches from my face. I looked back up to the ninja, who didn't make a move. I stood up, walking around her, but she remained, either stalwart and proud or frozen in place. After taking a step back, the latter proved itself to be true. The sky and the vegetation had ceased to move. The breeze present before was gone. Time stood still.

Something, someone emerged from what could've been a hole in reality itself.

"Kept you waiting, huh?"

The man before me had a roughly cut sideburn-beard-mustache combo, wore a black headband holding back his last three payments to his barber disguised as a mullet, as well as a grey tactical jumpsuit, and straps holding all sorts of ammunition and other weaponry. But how could that be possible, I'd heard that Snake had left us months ago, and yet here he was, standing right in front of me after emerging some sort of hole in reality. "Snake? What're you doing back here? And how're you doing all this?" I asked him, gesturing to the portal, and my frozen combatant. "It's a long story, but we time isn't a luxury we can afford right now, I need you to come with me Samus." He reached for my hand, but I pulled away from his reach, still unsure of how exactly all this was possible. "You expect me to just come with you after you freeze time and step out of some random portal? I want answers."

"Our reality is at stake, would you like to keep pointlessly fighting a shitty mock up of what a ninja is? Or would you like to come help me to stop our universe for being obliterated?" My eyes glance over at my opponent. "The choice is yours, either way you won't win this fight." I glare at him, more hurt than offended. "Fine, I'll go." I start to think about what I just got myself into. "Hurry up then this kind of urgent." Snake walks into the portal, and I follow closely behind. Going through the portal feels somewhat comfortable and warm, but at the same time I feel different. Like it's affecting me or perhaps, altering me? When I step out of the portal I look around the sky is dismal, and burdened with dark clouds and dread. The air is stale and unmoving, the grass crinkles instead of rustling. I look at my suit, it looks…. Different. Mostly aesthetic differences, but I feel heavier. How different was I? It's only been a couple years… My eyes follow Snake as he goes around me and behind some rocks. I follow him, searched for anything that looks out of place. Behind the cluster of rocks is a stairwell leading down. He goes down quickly as if something was following us. I hit my head on the entryway to the stairs. "Watch your head" Snake says with a bit of a chuckle. When we reach the bottom there are three doors, Snake knocks on the second floor first, then the third and the first last. A stone wall on the opposite side of the door slides down and reveals a small group of fighters sitting on the ground. "I brought along some extra help" snake says.

I recognize these fighters. They're all the escapees from all over the years. I suppose the security measures that were put up must have been necessary if they're all laying on the same spot in the ground. This is too real all for one moment, my head spins momentarily until a familiar face stops it. Pichu is just chillin' there like an asshole! Legends have told me that two of the most powerful heroes of all time, Roy and Mewtwo, escaped the brawl dragging Pichu along for the ride. Now here he sits, without any apparent obligations, seemingly oblivious to the fact that the people that saved him have been tossed back into the smash and sold off for amusement! "Listen here you rat-faced piece of shit!" I shout, his ears notably perking up at the sudden noise the silence. "Did you really just sit there and let your friends get captured again!?" I can sense that Snake has something to say about this by the cocky smile on his face. "Kid, you've got a lot to learn if you don't want to fight with the best. Either you throw yourself back into Master and Crazy Hand's grasps or you're going to help me -" Nana and Popo tighten their grips around their hammers, "- us. You're going to help us liberate the rest of the fighters, aren't you?" I take a step backwards, unable to ignore that nothing's in it for me. I'm still a bounty hunter, after all. "Hmph. One condition and I'm in, Snake." His arrogance shifts quickly to bewilderment. "Look, lady, I'm no hero, never was, never will be, but the course of action seems pretty obvious to me. What'll it be?" Brushing past the small arsenal that the group had, I determine that my lightweight blaster simply won't be enough to overthrow an entire franchise. "Where's my super suit?"


End file.
